 | AKA a self-righteous title for a self-interested attempt to save money on gas. OK, it's hyperbolic as well. Do I believe in free energy? Am I one of those wack-nuts that persists in believing that perpetual motion machines can operate in defiance of the first law of thermodynamics? No, but I don't believe we live in a closed system either .... |
So what's the goal?
To make this bitch-whore of a mistress, "The Road," more affordable. But I don't want to invest anything. So I had this idea that in exchange for a free hook up of one of the many fuel-saving devices out there, I would keep a blog of my fuel-savings as a kind of advertisement for alternative fuel businesses. More importantly, Johnny Appleseed-like, I would spread the word of freeing ourselves from the dominion of the big auto-manufacturers and the petro-chemical companies, through practical experimentation and self-reliance. Why not me, right? I mean, you think Kathy Griffin hasn't used one of these ----------------> on tour before? Mario Cantone? Doug Stanhope? That's right green manufacturers, there will be dildo jokes. It's a whole new economy, right? That's a gas vaporizer, by the way, one of many fuel-saving gadgets that's out there. Combined with something called an EFIE, claims of it's fuel-saving capability generally range from 20%-60%!
That's right, I don't know anything about this stuff!
Hey Ash, shouldn't you do a little research first? Let me tell you something. If you think I'm going to let just any old stranger shove a blender with enema attachments under my bonnet ... you're right! (That's a hydrogen booster, by the way, most of which are supposed to save about as much fuel as vaporizers do.) Look, I'm not smart or patient enough to figure all this out beforehand, and even if I were, I'd be missing out on savings and/or the important lessons that could be drawn from spectacular failures in the meantime. I don't know anything about propulsion, but I can't accept the notion that in the same time that computers have gone from filling a warehouse (while having less computing power than your phone) to the nano-scale, car engine technology, vis-a-vis fuel efficiency, has not progressed at all. There's a better answer out there, and I'm going to find it, and when I do, I'll pass it on.
What do I think I'll achieve?
Peter Pan's Never-Never Land, duh! Yes of course it'll start out with a 25%-50% increase in fuel efficiency, but I'm not gonna stop there! There's a guy out in WA claiming that with the proper combination of conversions, you could get 200mpg out of most cars. There are even wilder ideas out there, people claiming they can show you how to convert any normal engine to run on compressed air, others saying they can build an engine that draws it's energy from the Earth's magnetic field, requiring no (produced) fuel whatsoever! I'm gonna start by going to the dance with whoever chooses me, but after that, I'm only interested in systems with ever higher mileage. I mean let's go all the way with this thing! The Age of Aquarius is upon us, history is ending, the CONCRESCENCE (whatever the Hell that means) is here, an apotheosis of one kind or another is imminent for all humankind, either we will be uploaded or deleted, but change is a-comin', and I don't want to be on the sidelines holding the cool people's shoes!
Huh???
Look, maybe I've been watching too many Terence McKenna videos, but my question is, WHY HAVEN'T YOU?!? You science-y people who are too emotionally challenged to handle notions of spirituality may refer to it as "the singularity." But do you think free energy wouldn't transform every aspect of the human experience to the point of being unrecognizable? Anyway, sounds exciting, plus it's inevitable, so I want to be a part of it. And if all this sounds a bit grandiose, then I would say this is a sign of the impending event: grandiosity, like time, is speeding up; like information, it is expanding exponentially; like all complex systems, it is increasing in complexity at a rate that will soon pass the bounds of comprehension. For evidence of this, check out what's on TV, or any other comedian's blog. MARVEL AT MY NAVEL, WORLD! I PROCLAIM IT TO BE THE ALPHA AND THE OMEGA!
What's next?
1) I hit the road.
2) I wait to see which of the manufacturers want to get on board with a crass comedian such as myself, and I select a product based on the following factors:
a) claimed fuel savings
b) cost of parts and installation
c) ease of installation
d) how sweet the deal is for me! See, the eagle can fly with the condor.
3) I post updates and results.
4) You post comments like, "listening to you try to discuss technical matters is maddening, hilarious, and surprisingly, quite informative!" "You think that's good mileage, try this kick-ass device!" "When are you coming to our town to show us this amazing technology and share with us your hilarious stories and/or filthy jokes and how can we book you?" Stuff like that. (There's a link just down there to the right, FYI).
5) Eventually, we actually achieve over-unity as a practical everyday reality through grassroots, face-to-face connections without ever having to engage a broken and co-opted legislative system. We do it ourselves. With dick jokes -- the only truly 100% environmentally friendly fuel.
2) I wait to see which of the manufacturers want to get on board with a crass comedian such as myself, and I select a product based on the following factors:
a) claimed fuel savings
b) cost of parts and installation
c) ease of installation
d) how sweet the deal is for me! See, the eagle can fly with the condor.
3) I post updates and results.
4) You post comments like, "listening to you try to discuss technical matters is maddening, hilarious, and surprisingly, quite informative!" "You think that's good mileage, try this kick-ass device!" "When are you coming to our town to show us this amazing technology and share with us your hilarious stories and/or filthy jokes and how can we book you?" Stuff like that. (There's a link just down there to the right, FYI).
5) Eventually, we actually achieve over-unity as a practical everyday reality through grassroots, face-to-face connections without ever having to engage a broken and co-opted legislative system. We do it ourselves. With dick jokes -- the only truly 100% environmentally friendly fuel.
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